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Closer
Today I read a book where love is described as “The feeling of never being close enough. […] the need to somehow absorb you into my chest, so you’ll always be with me.” and I couldn’t stop thinking about Closer. I hope you’re not feeling lonely, and I hope you know you are loved. -D
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art exhibit
i was really excited to post about an art gallery i went to where each painting had a small flipbook with closeups of all the details. you could see the colour gradation and try to find that particular square in each painting, and it was so interactive and fun. i wanted a friend of mine […]
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cry
i have seen my dad cry 4 times in my life. the first one was when i was a kid, and i didn’t really understand our dog had passed away. the second one was when my parents were getting divorced, and my dad started crying while he and i were watching Castaway. he told me […]
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free
dearest Namjoon, you are FREE. you’re out and done and free and rid of the uniform. i’m so happy that that weight can finally slide off your shoulders and you can take a deep breath where your lungs fully expand. i know it was hard, i know you got scolded and you just wanted to […]
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discharge
you’re almost out. a single week left before you’re out and about and free and you never have to go back in there. in one week, you answer only to yourself, you sleep in your own bed, you wake up when you choose to, and you are the owner of your own time. does it […]
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i want to want
i’m having a hard day today, so i’m listening to your music. i want to find the right words and let them all burst from my chest, but i also want to take a vow of silence and just let life pass me by. i feel so dejected today, so helpless|hopeless and angry. i know […]
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deserve
you deserve every accolade, every cheer and flower and piece of praise. you deserve all the claps, and the bows and tears and grinning face. you deserve all the good things in the world, all the sunshine and joy and to find your happy place. you deserve it all and more, Namjoon, and for despair […]
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1주년
happy anniversary to rpwp. thank you for making me feel like i might be the right person even if i’m at the wrong place right now. thank you for singing the feelings that have been burning in my throat, for putting words to my thoughts, for making an album i can see myself in. thank […]
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locked out
last night i came home late, and the door to my bedroom was closed. i tried to open it and fall into bed, only to find it locked. it’s a new lock, a new door, a new room, a new house. and suddenly i just wanted to go home… except i don’t live there anymore, […]
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i am one
tonight i am acutely aware that i am one. i don’t have a team around me, and sometimes it feels like no one has my back unconditionally. when i see you with the boys, i am so happy that you have a chosen family, a place where you can always be yourself, a group of […]
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conversation
another day ends, another spin done. another chance to prove that life is better than the death. another day being Still Life, escaping the frame. thank you for making a song for every occasion, every mood. sometimes i try to imagine what it’d be like to try to thank you in person but i think […]
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Letters to Namjoon 